Someone else's victory is not your defeat!

How to defeat your colleagues at workplace

February 5, 2017

One of my friends wanted help on how to defeat her colleague who she claimed was ‘smarter ‘ than her, because there was a potential promotion coming up.
She cited a list of characteristics the other women possess, which she fears will help her snatch the position.

I can easily say in my two decades at different workplaces, I’ve seen them all. The ones who slog their asses off and get overlooked at promotions; the ones who only make their presence felt and get to eat the cake; the ones who never co-operate and share; the ones who are liberal with their time and resources; the ones who are so comfy in their seats they know not what team work is…

I would be lying if I said, none of them ever affected me. A few of them did. But when their ghosts returned home with me and began haunting my family, I sat up, zipped myself shut and concentrated on Me, Myself.

      This is not escapism or shirking away from reality or passiveness. I call this ‘active submission’. Reflect upon the situation you got yourself into. After all, it was your choice to accept the job.

Ask yourself two questions.

1. What do you expect from the job?

List them out in order of importance to you. They could be job satisfaction; career growth; enhancing your skills; travelling; money; perks; freebies; making new friends…

For majority, the priority list is not in a simple order of 1 to 10. They are combinations. They wish to have job satisfaction and money; or regular perks and career growth; or stress-free atmosphere, career growth and freebies…

2. How much can you compromise to achieve these?

That is when you are lost. Because you aren’t clear of your priority. Priority means just that. Priority. The one point that means everything to you.
For instance, if job satisfaction is your priority then being over-looked for promotion or politics at work should not bother you. Or, if money is your priority, then you would be affected if you miss that promotion. So what do you do? You enter into a competition with your co-workers. Fair enough!

However, the point to remember here is, you can defeat one person either by sprucing yourself up or by hook or crook. Then what? There will come a dozen others.

If the so-called competitor is more deserving [with better knowledge, better skills, is more productive…] then you may look into getting competitive. Put in the effort, master new skills, change your approach to work, go all out. Because in the bargain, you will at least become a better employee.

If the so-called competitor is not a deserving candidate, but is in the reckoning because of ‘unethical’ traits, [boss pamperers, responsibility shirkers; people teasers…] then you may want to think hard before getting competitive. Because in the bargain, you will end up losing yourself.

Does that promotion mean the life to you that you want to change your character and personality for it? If you can lose yourself to win that position and you can still sleep well then good luck.

Else, work towards being a better person each day, get better at your job every day, execute your responsibilities ethically, meet all your targets. In spite of these if you are still overlooked then it’s time to bid goodbye to that place. They don’t deserve you.

Someone else’s victory is not your defeat!

Nisha Sanjeev


  • Obsessivemom
    February 6, 2017

    Sane advice there. The trouble is we often get caught up in competing with all the wrong kind of people and end up being dragged down. Keeping your personal goals in sight is perhaps the key.

  • Rajlakshmi
    February 7, 2017

    Now that’s really well said. In this craze for competition, I have seen people become so bitter and rude to each other. No one seems to be happy with what they have got or achieved. And yes, if there’s competition, working hard and learning new stuff sounds more reasonable.

    • Nisha Sanjeev
      February 8, 2017

      People forget themselves and their purpose in this craze!

  • Parul Thakur
    February 7, 2017

    I could not agree more. As someone who talks to people on a regular basis on performance, expectations, and successes there is a lot of value in thinking what matters most. To each its own. Like you rightly said, if one feels passed over for everything that she does – something is certainly not right.
    Hey – I liked the look of the blog, Looks great! 🙂

  • Shilpa Garg
    February 10, 2017

    Agree with you completely. It’s important to list your priorities and then let go of some of the other irritants or simply move on. But it’s not always that simple.